Parents’ Secrets for Letting ADHD Kids Shine

Many children with ADHD are brilliant, but channeling their energy can be challenging. In the past few months, parents posting on MSN Health & Fitness message boards have shared both the difficulties and the bright spots of raising an ADHD child. Here are their tried-and-true ways to bring a child’s uniqueness to light without dimming its personality. (Some posts may have been edited.)

First, Make a List

The most effective thing that we did for our children was to put everything in lists. We created a poster board that hung on the back of their bedroom door and it listed the things they were expected to do in the morning. For example, eat breakfast, brush teeth, put pants on, put shirt on, etc. This gave our kids direction and allowed them to fully know what was expected of them. It wasn't easy to implement this into our routine, but if we found them having trouble, we would help them, work with them on how they could figure out where they left off and where they needed to continue from.—Posted by proudmomofthree on Sept. 20, 2006.

Keep a daily schedule. Repeat the same routine every day if possible. Do homework at the same time each day, take a bath or shower at the same time, and so on.—Posted by Kimberly Cav-ADHD mom on Aug. 28, 2006.

In our life, lists backfired. If you give an ADHD child too many instructions or things to do at once they will not be able to get started with the first one. However, structure and routine are vital.—Posted by Mom of older adults on Sept. 27, 2006.

The Carrot and the Stick

It’s amazing what a stack of nickels can do. My son had chores to do. For each finished task he got a nickel. At the end of the week, I would stack up all the nickels he could have earned, and then gave him the ones he did earn—the rest were mine for doing the work he didn't do. It didn't take long for him to see that my stack was higher than his and he got the point by seeing the difference in the stacks of nickels.—Posted by loving kids on Sept. 27, 2006.

Rewards are a great idea, but not candy or sweets. If your child has ADHD, sweets are the enemy.—Posted by lccbsc on Aug. 17, 2006.

The more I stand my ground the more my son is coming around to see that tantrums are not the way to get what he wants. It actually works to stay strong in a positive way.—Posted by teacher4children on Aug. 3, 2006.

My daughter is 7 years old and was diagnosed with ADHD last year. I try to talk out things with her calmly. A lot of the time, it doesn't work. If my daughter just cannot concentrate or refuses to listen, she gets sent to a corner for three minutes. She sees it as a punishment, I try to look at it as time for her to focus and think about what she has done and why she was sent to the corner. That helps a lot. After she gets out of the corner, she has to tell me what she thought about, what she did wrong, and why she shouldn't do it. It’s quiet time for her, and sometimes this is the only way for her to settle down enough so she can hear her own thoughts.—Posted by vbunnell_rma on Aug. 16, 2006.

My son has been very into money lately. When I have to give him a third warning, I make him give me anything from 50 cents to $10 (for lying) from his savings. He hates it. But it works! I no longer am screaming my brains out. Now, when I get to two he usually stops the behavior.—Posted by wileyone on Aug. 16, 2006.